Hope?

SHE STILL CAN’T BELIEVE IT

A true story

The car speeds along the highway, doing at least 80 kmph through the light early morning traffic. It is only 6 a.m. and they hit the road half an hour ago. There are two cars in the entourage, one an SUV in which seven hopeful souls have managed to fit in and the other a sedan travelling behind it which carries another four. All of them are praying that there be no traffic jam at the inter-state checkpoint, notorious for delays running into hours. She is travelling in the sedan.

The wind blows across her soft, feminine features, pulling at her hair which lies in a careless bundle on her shoulders, framing her face. Her face with its big, brown eyes, a high forehead and nose for which she has been relentlessly teased in school. Her embroidered, black churidar matches perfectly with her almost angelic colour. She is watching the beautiful scenery in the early morning light. A part of her is taking in the beauty while another part is tensed, nearly hopeless about what lies ahead; the stories she has heard are not encouraging.

In the SUV the mood is much too different. There is a slight current of tension but a general air of bonhomie prevails. All of the eleven have good academic grades but this recruitment test for M————– has arrived right before their last semester-end university exam. Most of them don’t know if going today will do any good; without any time for preparation all they can hope to gain is a little more exposure. There will be nearly a 1,000 participants and all of them will be good competition. Well, life isn’t always fair so no use worrying about what you have no control over.

They cross the inter-state checkpoint on time without any delays and the eleven heave a collective sigh of relief. Now there will be time for breakfast. The drivers are quite familiar with this city and they stop at a Hotel Anna. The eleven pile out of the two cars and head for the hotel.

She gets out quickly, wanting to join her crowd of friends. She is a gregarious person and loves most sorts of company. She selects the order for the entire group and sits down at a table. A guy from the SUV sits down across her and starts talking with an air of insouciance. She looks at him and wonders how he can be so flippant about something so important. This recruitment is a big chance for him, for everybody. She glances across to the other table where another friend is eating quietly. He is the other extreme and has been working hard the entire exam season. He’s the best prepared for the test; she wonders if he ever takes a break.

With their hunger sated for the moment they return to the vehicles. There is yet another hour of travel left before they can reach the college where the test is being held. The college is on the city outskirts and is another one of the innumerable colleges that seem to spring up like weeds around this city. The going is slow. They have to keep asking the way every now and then, taking a left, then a right then another left hoping to reach the correct place. A wrong turn could cost them precious time.

They finally manage to reach the college, half an hour before their reporting time and take their time to look around the campus in amazement. This is a world apart from their college. This college has buildings more suited to some medieval castle (complete with gargoyles) than a twenty first century engineering college. The sport ground is so huge they wonder if this college backs up as a residential colony. Once their initial amazement is over they head for the auditorium where they get a first glance at their competition: nearly a thousand students in all hues and colours.

Her hearts dips a little lower at the sight of these many faces. She knew that there would be a nearly a thousand students but it is easier to deal with statistics than actual people, especially when everyone is tough competition. She can hardly control her despair in the face of so much confidence that is displayed by everybody here. They probably do not have semester-end exams to worry about.

Here they are made to wait for another 2 hours before their batch can go for the test. The time arrives, their names are called and they all file out to the lab for the online test. In the test lab she finds herself between the flippant chap and the hard working chap. Both of them are brilliant in their own way and she can see them tackle each question with confidence. Calculations and counter-calculations are done on both sides and all she can do is stare at the screen. She is the academic topper in the eleven but finds it hard to find solace in that fact. She does each question to the best of her ability not for an instant believing that her best is going to be good enough to crack this test. The questions look deceptively simple but are laced with hidden traps. C and C++ programming language code floats off the screen as her brain fights to make sense of it, trying not to let her emotions overwhelm her. In 45 minutes the ordeal is over and as they all file out of the lab she can hear everyone discussing each question in its minutiae. Each opinion tells her what she has done wrong and how badly she has done. All the despair catches up with her, her eyes fill with tears but she never lets them roll down her cheeks. She dislikes crying in public; for her tears are a private matter. So she holds them in and decides to busy herself with studying for the last semester-end exam the next day. At least she can be confident with that subject. So she asks the hardworking guy to help. She knows he never takes a break.

Everybody else decides to tour the place a little more. They have 2 hours until the result is announced and there is a lot left to see. They roam around taking in the stunning greenery in the campus that is a far cry from their own barren wasteland. They enter some of the buildings, strolling through indoor courts and marvelling at the classes (though they are stopped by guards at the main ‘palace’ gate). The most beautiful sight, though, is a bunch of peacocks on the far side of the campus lying in the shade of trees. The national bird has a good population here. So they tour and return to the auditorium to find her waiting for them.

The organizers said the results would be out by 2 o’clock but it is 4.30 by the time the result sheet arrives. The moment she has dreaded has finally arrived. This result sheet with all the names of all the people who cracked the test is a final nail in her coffin. She knows her name will not be there but she finds a small measure of solace in the fact that at least one of her friends will get it. The names are called out one by one, college by college. Her college has the least number of participants so she knows only one or two will be selected. No matter whom it is she has to bottle down her own feelings and be able to congratulate them. So she readies herself and then only one name is called out from her college, S——- That is her name they just called out!! She can only stare at the organizers in disbelief. There is another test left but she never expected herself to cross the first round at all. As she walks to the lab for the second test she feels bewildered and still in shock and she is half-scared if her friends will hate her for getting through especially since she had no hope of getting it. She is the only one from her college who made it and so there is not even a familiar face to wish her a simple all the best. As she enters the lab it strikes her that she is not, in the least, prepared for this, busy as she was drowning her sorrow in another subject. Yet as she attempts the first of the two questions of the second test she feels a confidence and joy descend over. Perhaps some of her friends have prayed for her now and sent their wishes upon the air to her. All is not yet lost.

When she comes out all her friends surround her and congratulate her. She is the shining star of the moment and she loves every second of it. She can still scarcely believe the fact that she is the one who got through. She tells her friends about the second test and she knows she has done her best. Is it good enough? She still cannot answer that for sure but now she can hope. As they prepare to leave and get into the cars one of her friends hands her a bar of chocolate as congratulations and as she takes it she can think only one thought “Chocolate!! There is no better way to celebrate.”